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Special Thanks to...
Helen from ImCreative (gfx)

DJ Soundwave

Mouse

Simplex

Kid Kapri

Ricky Parker

the Atomics (prod)

EQ Professionals (prod)

and ALL OF YOU GUYS WHO DOWNLOAD THE TAPE. Good Look.


THE ALLURE DROPS IN MAY! The game need change and I'm the cashier.

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Facts of Lyfe: Wanna be a rap superstar?

It just keeps getting better. But, it feels like just last week I was doing this [You were]. And now, it's already time for another SMACKDOWN with the Facts of Lyfe.

I had some issues coming up with a topic for this week's Facts, and with alot of counsel [james goodman, alex furgeson, and kalissa], I have decdided to use none of your suggested topics lol. Well, Alex kinda. But the other ones will appear in future FACTS, trust me.

Todays topic is RAP SUPASTAR!!
You wanna be a rapper and get paid? just follow this weeks FACTS OF LYFE, and trust me, you'll be in the big leagues.

Ready? Let's do it.

Fact: You must place yourself in a category: gangster, back-packer. concious. southern. eastcoast. westcoast. etc....

Fact: Each category had TOO MANY DAMN SUBCATEGORIES! but you must also choose one. Let's examine.
West Coast: Bay area, Gangster, SoCal, Punk, Alternative [alt. will be used to describe those not recognized by the mainstreem]
East Coast: NYC, DMV, Philly
Southern: ATL, HTOWN, any thing encompassed in the state of Florida, random ass states in between texas and Georgia, Ratchett, N.O. Bounce, New Orleans
Back-packer: Hipster, alternative, concious
okay im done. too many

Fact: You must have an extensive crew and entourage with a really cool name.

Fact: You must have your own clothing line or exclusively support/wear some high fashion line.

Fact: You must enlist the hottest producer at the time to produce some of your songs.

Fact: You absolutely MUST talk reckless on any DVD magazine interviews. This is crucial, because the 13 year olds that actually BUY these insteada lookin' at them for free on the internet must BELIEVE in your gangster.

Fact: You have to take a formerly homosexual trend and make it cool. Or, you can be openly homosexual and make it cool.

Fact: You must associate with a notorious gang. Bloods and Crips or old news so take the side road. Don't forget about the Vicelords, Latin Kings, Folk Nation. They need love too.

Fact: You must name yourself after a notoroiously violent drug dealer from your hometown and claim his street life as your own. If you're from some place that doesn't have this commodity, then just make one up, along with your street life.

Fact: You must beef with at least ONE prominent rapper.

Fact: You must sleep with Rocsi from 106 and park.

Fact: You must tell all media outlets of your fiasco.

Fact: You have to make a coonerific song with a trendy dance to match. The best way to do this is to use old nursery rhymes or children's games that originated in slavery and put them over deep bass and claps.

Fact: You must talk like you only made it to 3rd grade grammar and/or language.

Fact: The only topics to be found in your songs are topics of awesome adultery, good gangsterism, hollywood hatin' , and stuntastic ballin'.

Fact: Your beats must have a chopped and screwed voice on the chorus with 70's soul music sample of a song you probably never heard or know any thing about.
....man it's alotta facts this week...okay a few more.

Fact: When asked in an interview who your influences were, you must respond by saying, "I ain't have no influences, just mah niggaz"

Fact: When speaking on political or world issues, the only commentary you should give is..."that's bullshit yah know"

Fact: You must make a song about your favorite shoe, with Jermaine Dupri. AND have T-Pain do the chorus

Okay....that's this week's facts. Check-in next week for another awesome go @ it.

DAVE CORESH!!!!!

YOU BETTA RECOGNIZE!!!!

Dave coresh is illa than manilla....reala than trilla [had to get rick ross, he sucha dumbie]....and....well i couldn't think of nething else.



But regardless. the Chitown by way of DMV emcee realizes the world is his for the taking...and quite frankly....HE TAKIN IT!

So.....ima let the dude SPEAK! u know how I MURK the interviews...

If Dave Coresh was a Nickelodeon character he would be DOUG FUNNIE:
"I'd be Doug because, yah know, Doug was calm and cool." --- [I'd be Skeeter...just because his name is SKEETER!]

Dave Coresh started rappin' because....
"I started rapping because of like the battle rappers. I'm talkin' bout yah Cassidy's, Loaded Lux's, Jae Millz's....yah SMACK DVD RAPPERS! I loved SMACK DVD!!" ---- [SMACK DVD was and still is the best DVD magazine hands down....no matter how many fake guns and money was flaunted....it presented an outlet for the Rick Ross' and Plies' of the world who didnt have major deals to COON they ass off w/o gettin media attention!]

What are your goals in rap?
"I set small goals yah know. Get my buzz. Drop a mixtape here, mixtape there, ep here and there. I want to be a hot commodity."

Now it's time for what I call....ONE WORD ASSOCIATION! w/ Dave Coresh
here we go....(the following views are those of Dave Coresh and do not respect the views of us here at Deronzbassment.blogspot.com)

2007 = Lil Wayne [Dave C. says Wayne killed it in '07]

Lil Wayne = Average [Dave C. says that's JUST HOW HE FEEL!!]

Chicago = BEST CITY! [Dave C. calls the Chi the boiling pot of ALL culture]

Hipster = Kanye West [ Dave C. says not only did Kanye make it cool to wear tight pants but he also made it cool just be you]

Kid Sister = Sexy as HELL

Best Rapper Alive = Jay Z

Detox = WHY?!!?!?!?? [Dave C. says Dr. Dre is the hip hop MICHAEL JORDAN...and Detox is his Wizards stunt]

Rapper I wanna collabo with = Kanye West

Regardless....
Dave C.'s new mixtape "Boy Wonder Vol. 1" is now available for download mah homey matt's page http://www.lensflairchicago.com/ ....SO GO DOWNLOADED CAUSE ME AND LOVE RA SAID SO!!!! RARWRWARARAREW!!!!

GUCCI BANDANNA!!!

Chicago WRAP UP!

So...there are only 2 words to describe my visit to the Chi

and those words are....



FRIGGIN' AWESOME!



It's too much to just try to break down in one breath...so we are going to take it day by day...

Day ONE, the Arrival:

Get into the Chi on my G-mode with the addidas sweatpants, white tee, and the Foamposite Slams.

Check into the HYATT REGENCY! the hotel was on point people. the view was SICK! I'll take a lake over an ocean any day lol.



So anywayz, change up the fit to business attire to head over to the convention, Ralph Lauren sport coat and slacks, dark green tie with the brown leather dockers slams and I'm out.

FAST FORWARD: Dinner at this Brazilian BBQ joint. Let me just say, you haven't had meat until you've had Brazilian meat [pause.]. But it was good. Pork tenderloin and PLATAnOS!!! AGH!!!!

That nite. Chill. Chill. and mo' Chill.



Made a mad dash around the city for a minute then came back to the Hyatt for what I must say was the GREATEST FREESTYLE SESSION OF ALL TIME! shouts out to Corn , Bates, Matt, LoveRa...GUCCI BANDANNA!

ETA of sleep...2 hours



Day 2, Debauchery

Fast Forward past the Convention lol.

Back @ the Hotel.

The Scripps interns DO IT! We got big plans...that's all i'ma say yeh digg. We up next tho'.



The I'm shopping. Leaders...Juggrnaut...Akira...that HOT SPOTS yeh digg.

Vintage Redskins starter cap? Check

Olive Green AJ 12 Gourmets? Check

Vintage Adidas Olympic Hoody? CHeck

Dont know, then you betta ask ME!



Dinner? GORDANOS! [sp. that's not how it's spelled or said but EFF it lol].

Deep dish CHITWON Pizza....mmmmmmm. Uno's is a SCAM!

Next, SKY BAR. Techno clubs are FUN regardless of what you think. OPEN YO MINDZ PEOPLE!!!

Top the nite off w/ a chill session in the suite...livin' large people.





Day 3, MAMBO SAUCE IN CHICAGO~!?!?!??!?!

Title speaks for itself.

There is chicken and mambo sauce in chicago. But they call it....MILD SAUCE.

COLD!





And that was pretty much the highlights of my trip.

Shouts out to:

LoveRa

Rob Bates

Javier [i'm adoptin' you as a lil' bro when u get to HU]

Nick

Matt [lensflairchicago.com]

JALESSA!!!!! heart of my lyfe.

and cant forget the homie Dave C.

I'm Going Home Again (if I was Kanye)

Tommorrow, I venture off to Chicago.

This'll be a first for me and a good look considerin' how much I admire what's going on in the city as far as pop culture right now, and I think that the country's other metropolitan areas should PAY ATTENTION!

Except for the D.m.V...we know what we're doing, yah kno?

So anyway, here are some things I will be looking forward to

- Seeing that statue of Michael Jordan in front of the United Center

[Regardless of the fact that he is the best basketball player of all time, this dude has been immortalized in a mythological type statue, and he's black! go figure lol]

- Spending ridiculous amounts of money in trendy Chi-town boutiques

[NYC and LA hold the specialty fashion down, but Chi-town is right up there with'em I think, and I plan on spazzing]

- I was told there is a district or area in the city that is home to the HIPHOP SUBCULTURE that we have come to know as Cool Kidz, Kidz In the Hall, Kid Sister, modern Kanye West, Lupe and Lupesque artists

[I just noticed alotta those name had "kid" in it, and I say modern Kanye because if you hadn't noticed, Kanye was more Memphis Bleek than Pharell with fashion when he first came out]

- Diving face first into a REAL deep dish pizza [stop being nasty ladies]

Now that's a lot to do in about 2 & 1/2 days, but, I'm Deron damnit....

Let's get it.

I'll be updating frequently during the visit and will offer an AWESOME wrap-up upon my arrival in Tulsa.

"These dude be trippin' cause I'm Jordan they Pippen, mad I'm the Best Ever and they just my assistant."

- Deron